Becoming a Whisperer

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If I use the term “horse whisperer,” who or what pops into your mind?

  • Buck Brannaman?
  • Monty Roberts and his book?
  • The Nicholas Sparks book?
  • Robert Redford movie made from Sparks’s book?
  • A different clinician?
  • The 19th century British Toadmen?

Well, it certainly isn’t me. I hope not. I’m more of an equine squeak toy.

Besides, my horse time has been curtailed. As in, like, BOOM. That’s it.

Many of you are in a similar same boat.

So, I’m making the best of things, if possible. I aspire, for the foreseeable future, to become an Instacart whisperer.

What is this Instacart of which you speak?

Instacart is a website that offers online ordering for pickup or delivery from various local stores who’ve signed on for the service. 

In this respect, I’m lucky I live in the suburbs because I have many options, including local and independently owned stores.

I order, pick an available time for delivery, pay by credit card, and then the bags get left on my front porch.

After this siege is over, I’ll be using delivery regularly. I’ll have more time to get things accomplished, such as writing in this blog.

We live in interesting times

However, as the curse says, we live in interesting times. Way more people need the service. We all pretty much want the same things. There are shortages and substitutions. The “next available delivery time” can be days out. So, no “oh, I’m out of such&such, so I’ll get it and have it in an hour.” Uh, no.

As household quartermaster monitoring our food and other consumable supplies, I have to sync up when we’ll run out of something and time the delivery accordingly. Except it’s not up to me. It’s up to availability.

Likewise for products. The hunt for toilet paper is real, but this family is lucky because, thanks to living in New England in winter, I make a point of stocking a bit ahead. I don’t have a closet full, but I’m not going bananas trying to find some.

My cart at Costco on March 13 held eggs, burgers, blueberries, and dissolvable fiber, not cleaning wipes and what the commercials in the late 20th century called “toilet tissue.” 

My strategy

I determine what we need next. (Just so you know, I’m only monitoring who has toilet paper. Not buying right now.)

I may end up going through various Instacart merchants, searching, and usually moving on. Until I find what I want. I have a list.

Then, that merchant gets the order. If they have the products I want, we’re gonna do business.

I also make a point of monitoring when the next available delivery date is. In less-challenging times, customers used to get their products in five hours, at the very least. I’m not finding that now.

Working on being the Instacart Whisperer

So, Instacart is an online merchant, not a horse. But now it’s pretty unpredictable.

I ask for what you want. I may not get it. I do what I can to be helpful to the pickers and I always tip via the website, of course.

It’s more of a sure thing than gambling at the casinos or the track. (Anyone who reads this blog knows I don’t go to the track for the gambling anyway. Unless I try some greasy food.)

In the documentary about him, horse whisperer Buck Brannaman refers to riding as “a dance.” 

I agree. I tend to treat it as partner yoga because I’m a clumsy dancer, but less clumsy at yoga.

I want to work with the horse and “speak” his or her “dialect” of the aids.

So, for the time being, attempted horse whispering isn’t part of my life.

Instacart whispering is.

So, how are y’all getting supplies? Armoring up and going out? Using a fave delivery service? Let us know in the comments below.

PS – No affiliate links here. Y’all know how to use a web search engine.


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